I Didn’t Intend To, But I Will

I hadn’t intended to write about this at all. I had intended to disappear for a few days. But, I feel like I need to explain myself  just a little bit. It might explain my attitude and personality down the road a little as well. For which I apologize.

My son and I spent a beautiful day at the lake last Sunday. It was perfect. We picniced. We played with lady bugs for hours. We spashed in the water. He listened to the radio I hung in the tree. It was a beautiful perfect day.

And then we came home.

To complete devastation on the outside and the inside of my house. A storm had swept through the area. Worse than the one just a week before. And because I live in such a forest, a house completely surrounded by trees, the debris was like a tornado had hit.  And because of the previous storm, the gutters around my house failed to do their jobs, so water got in. I also had an animal that had to be immediately taken the vet.  My kitty. I spent all night with him. And surveyed the premises the next day.  I lost my entire garden, which I think is the most disappointing part.

Did I mention my husband was not home. Just me and my dino man.

My  kitty didn’t recover and on an overcast day in July, I had to make the decision to let him go. A kitty that had been with me for 13 years. That purred every single time I touched him, up until the very last seconds of his life. A kitty that I brought home from a farm in North Dakota and cried on my brother’s shoulders for 13 straight hours.  Most people who know me, know that I am pretty attached to my animals. They are just furry children to me.  I depend on their company and love.

My son’s words “don’t worry mom…his sister is up there waiting for him” He was right. He’s a wise old man. The only thing he was concerned about was that his mom was sad. And he wanted me not to be. Unfortunately he has to be such a big boy sometimes, and he does an amazing job at it.

There is one more thing we were dealing with this past week/month and I have debated talking about it. I ordinarily would keep it to myself, but it is something that has been and will continue to affect our daily lives.   I’m not writing this for attention or sympathy.  Just as an explanation. And sometimes things are easier to read than to talk about face to face.

We have a family member with cancer. My husband’s father. Treatments are here in Cheyenne for the moment and we started them this week.  My house is theirs for as long as they need. The emotional roller coaster has been difficult. We have explained everything to our son…who is dealing well with it. Kids are resilient.  And smarter than we give them credit for.

God is good. “He doesn’t bring you to it if  He can’t bring you through it.”

And we will get through it.

Sidewalk.

Garden

That is my lawn….

8 comments
  • Shannon

    I’m so sorry about Morgan. I loved that big ole ball of fluff. Please keep me updated on Brady’s dad. I miss you guys!

  • Cheryl Mello

    Stacey, sorry for your loss and we are praying for Dad.

  • Kristine Pratt

    When it rains it always seems to pour! All those things at once is so awful. Writing is always therapeutic for me as well. You’re in my thoughts and prayers…

  • Heidi

    Stacy, you are so brave to share your heart & everything that has been going on through your blog. Many people aren’t able to do that. From much experience, even though it doesn’t seem like it now, this will only make you a stronger person and you will be able to better empathize and help others when they are going through hard times. Keep thinking positively like you’re doing! My prayers are with you and your family.

  • Heidi

    And so sorry…totally left the “e” out of your name, Stacey! 🙂

  • staceyjean22

    Thank you everyone for your kind words.

  • kara

    You guys are constantly in our prayers. Hope you know that. Love you guys!

  • Cara Chambers

    I am glad that you shared this, just so you can see how many people care about you and your family. I hope you can read these comments and know that we are all thinking about you and praying for you and your family.